“Trump’s ‘Historic’ UK Trade Deal: A Masterclass in Doing Almost Nothing”
By Natalie Sherman, BBC News (with a heavy dose of sarcasm)
Oh, rejoice! After weeks of grueling negotiations (or, more accurately, a few awkward phone calls), the US and UK have struck a groundbreaking trade deal that changes… well, almost nothing. But hey, why let reality spoil a perfectly good press conference?
When President Trump unveiled his latest round of “America First” tariffs last month—because nothing says “economic genius” like slapping taxes on your allies—he promised to “fix” trade. And by “fix,” he apparently meant “keep most of the tariffs in place but call it a win anyway.”
The ‘Substantive’ Deal (If You Squint)
The big reveal? The 10% tariff on most UK goods? Still there. The real concessions? The US graciously agreed to slightly ease up on punishing UK steel and cars—because nothing boosts your economy like making it marginally less painful for Brits to sell you things.
In exchange, the US secured the highly specific and totally not vague promise that American beef and ethanol might have a slightly better shot at UK shelves. Truly, a triumph for capitalism.
Stan Veuger, an economist at the American Enterprise Institute, summed it up perfectly: “They basically took the status quo, made marginal changes, and called it a deal.” Or, in Trumpian terms: “Art of the Deal, baby!”
Who’s Happy? (Spoiler: Almost Nobody)
- UK Steel & Car Makers: Relieved! Because nothing says “victory” like still paying higher tariffs than before, just not as high.
- US Farmers: Mildly pleased, but mostly confused. The American Farm Bureau called it an “important first step,” which is political speak for “We got crumbs, but we’ll take it.”
- Luxury Car Buyers: Cheers! The ultra-wealthy can now import their Rolls-Royces and Bentleys at a slightly less outrageous cost. Priorities, people!
- US Automakers: Furious. Because why wouldn’t you make British cars cheaper than American ones built in Mexico? Logic!
The Real Reason for the ‘Breakthrough’?
Let’s be honest—this deal wasn’t about economics. It was about Trump’s desperate need to wave something in front of the cameras before his tariffs start causing actual economic pain.
Paul Ashworth, an economist at Capital Economics, put it bluntly: The announcement signals “rising desperation” in the White House to ease tariffs before they backfire spectacularly.
Meanwhile, the Actual Trade War Rages On
While Trump pats himself on the back for this “historic” UK deal (which, again, changes almost nothing), the real economic threat comes from China—where tariffs have skyrocketed to 145%, trade has plummeted, and shortages loom.
But hey, who needs coherent trade policy when you can just declare victory and move on?
The Verdict?
As former US Ambassador Lewis Lukens diplomatically put it: “It gives Trump a political victory with not too much really to show behind it.”
In other words: Another day, another hollow “win” in the Trump trade saga.
